Tuesday, June 1, 2010

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:15 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Posted: 31 May 2010 01:00 PM PDT

Since moving into our house, Rachel has taken over a portion of the basement where there is a workshop.

She learned how to use all the tools and has started building longboards. She even built a press to form the concave and camber curves in the board while creating the board. I'm so impressed with what she's been doing in her workshop.

Her second longboard looks like a Ceviche. That's the black one on the right.

She has been building her third board, the longer one in the picture above, over the past few weeks and took the trucks and wheels off the Ceviche-style board so she can fit them onto the new board.

Longboards and skateboards are fully customized when built, starting with a collection of components that you purchase separately. Trucks are the metal hardware that the wheels attach to. The picture below is the belly of her first board with one set of trucks and wheels already off.

So how are longboards different from skateboards? (Here's my mom's-view explanation. You other boarders may disagree and I welcome any clarification.) Skateboards are smaller and nimble for jumps and tricks and looping in and out of skateparks and bowls. You've seen these boards on the X-Games, Tony Hawk video games, and in pictures on boys' t-shirts. Longboards are less about vertical jumps and airborne tricks and more about cruising, gliding, and horizontal maneuvers.

Skateboards to longboards is like:

Jeep Wrangler - Cadillac Escalade

barn storming - hang gliding

chihuahuas - labrador retreivers

...kinda sorta...

Here's a video of some guys using the Ceviche.
Tomorrow I'll show you a couple of guys on the Whirling Dervish longboard.

Pam's Inbox

5:02 AM

Pam's Inbox

1-2-3

Posted: 22 May 2010 03:21 PM PDT

On his 77th birthday, Pete got a gift certificate from his wife Molly.

The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man and wondered what he was in for.

The medicine man slowly and methodically produced a potion, handed it to him, and with a grip on his shoulder, warned, "This is powerful medicine and it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then say 1-2-3. When you do that, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."

The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"

The medicine man responded, "Your partner must say 1-2-3-4, but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."

Eager to see if it worked, the old man went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, He took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3".
Immediately, he was the manliest of men.

His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes. And then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"

And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition.... because we could end up with a dangling participle...

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:06 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

The most dangerous cake recipe in the world

Posted: 19 May 2010 10:16 AM PDT

5 MINUTE CHOCOLATE MUG CAKE
4 tablespoons flour
4 tablespoons sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 egg
3 tablespoons milk
3 tablespoons oil
3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)
A small splash of vanilla extract
1 large coffee mug (MicroSafe)

Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well. Add the egg and mix thoroughly.

Pour in the milk and oil and mix well..

Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla extract, and mix again.
Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts.

The cake will rise over the top of the mug, but don't be alarmed!

Allow to cool a little, and tip out onto a plate if desired.
EAT ! (this can serve 2 if you want to feel slightly more virtuous).

And why is this the most dangerous cake recipe in the world?
Because now we are all only 5 minutes away from chocolate cake at any time of the day or night!

Pam's note: You could even pre-mix several cakes worth of dry ingredients in a container and make your cake with 3/4 c of mix. Now you're only 4 minutes away from chocolate cake. Yikes!

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:31 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Awkward Family Photos

Posted: 14 May 2010 02:47 PM PDT

A while ago, my friend Gautam emailed me a link to the funniest thing I have seen in ages. I was cleaning out some stuff on my computer when I came across this again.

Have you ever had family portraits taken for your church directory?

We have (when I was a kid) and they were terrible.

If you know the shame I'm talking about, don't delay. Head straight over to Awkward Family Photos post haste. You'll feel much better about your own family photos.

Brace yourself.

PS: A link has been posted to the sidebar of our blog, Pam's Inbox.

Pam's Inbox

5:13 AM

Pam's Inbox

WALK NAKED IN AMERICA DAY

Posted: 12 May 2010 08:33 AM PDT

Don't forget to mark your calendars.

As you may already know, it is a sin for a Muslim male to see any woman other than his wife naked and if he does, he must commit suicide. So next Saturday at 1 PM Eastern Time, all American women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists.

Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

All patriotic men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their houses to demonstrate their support for the women and to prove that they are not Muslim terrorist sympathizers. Since Islam also does not approve of alcohol, a cold 6-pack at your side is further proof of your patriotism.

The American government appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-terrorist activity.

God bless America!

P.S. It is your patriotic duty to inform others. If you don't send to at least 1 person, you're a terrorist-sympathizing, lily-livered coward and are possibly aiding and abetting terrorists.

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

6:12 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

The Picture of Pam & Frank

Posted: 07 May 2010 09:50 PM PDT

Typical.

Pam's Inbox

5:31 AM

Pam's Inbox

computer error

Posted: 02 May 2010 03:39 PM PDT

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Eric grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?'

'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

I used to like Eric !!!!!!

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:44 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Mr. Fenton's Shenanigans

Posted: 27 Apr 2010 10:17 PM PDT

Pam's note: I can relate to this.

When Frank and I were first married, we would do our weekly grocery shopping at 1am, which was right after Minneapolis bar time. Sometimes we were SUI: shopping under the influence.

(Yes, mom, we took the last bus from work at the downtown Marriott to the Uptown Lund's, then took a taxi home from the store. Our SUI never had a chance of a DUI.)

While shopping in the nearly empty store, we'd play hide and seek among the stacks of boxes in the aisles, which were being stocked on the shelves at that hour.

The manager made the rounds each night, asking shoppers if they were finding everything all right. One time I was having a hard time finding Frank's hiding spot, so when the manager asked if I was finding everything, I jokingly said,

"I can't find my husband..."

"Ahh," the manager replied. "Aisle 6."

♥ ♥ ♥

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart.

Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men--he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.

Equally unfortunately, Mrs. Fenton was like most women--she loved to browse. One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her local Wal-Mart.

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may be forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2 . July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, "Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away."

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a "CAUTION - WET FLOOR" sign to a carpeted area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, he practiced his "Madonna look" by using different sizes of funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed "OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!"

And last, but not least

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!"

Regards,
Walmart

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:19 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Wow. Lost and Found via the Internet

Posted: 24 Apr 2010 04:41 PM PDT

One day I was poking around the internet and decided again to Google the names of some people I have lost touch with over the years. I do that every so often to see who shows up. You never know.

On this particular search through my list of names, I found a guy who could possibly be Nilo, one of my host brothers from the 4-H exchange trip I took to Spain in 1987, so I emailed him with a link to my Adventures blog. I asked if he might be a member of my host family, and mentioned a couple of details I remember about him.

I put the matter out of my head because I was busy with moving and two road trips down to southern California. Que sera', sera'.

About a month or two after sending out that email to Nilo in Spain, I got this reply with pictures.

It's my "other family!"

The reply is bittersweet, though. When I was in Spain my host sister, Ana, and I did everything together - we were the same age and had a lot of common interests. In the middle of Nilo's letter he simply says that she died in 1996 (approx age 29.) I cried and cried over Ana, partly because I felt so bad for her and her family, and partly because I was disappointed I wouldn't get to reunite with her again. That sad news aside, it looks like everyone is doing very well.

I have translated the letter here: (and am VERY surprised I can still read Spanish this well; I haven't really used it since '87.)

Pam:
We are glad to know you are well. We have looked at many of your photos of your family.
You were in Valladolid and Matadeon (Spain) in 1987? You were 19 years old.
We now live in Leon from July to October and in Matadeon from November to June.
Javier lives in Madrid. Nilo (Jr.) in Leon, although he travels world wide. Ana Maria died in 1996.
We think of you often and continue to be your "Second Family."
Looking forward to more things from your life.
We wish the best to you and your family,
Kisses,
Nilo (father) Chiqui, Javier, and Nilo (son)

PS: You might notice I added a page translation gadget near the top of this page.

"TRADUZCA ESTA PÁGINA" is Spanish for "Translate this page" and the instructions tell you how to read this page in Spanish. I did that to make it easier for my "other family" to read this in Spanish. If you' like to read it in another language, the widget has other language options as well.

I hope the translated page is readable and any grammatical errors are hilariously funny instead of confusing.

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:14 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Roasted Potatoes with Chicken

Posted: 21 Apr 2010 12:02 PM PDT

We don't make this often enough. It was discovered in one of Frank's cookbooks on roasting, and was mentioned as a simple recipe to serve to company. It IS extremely simple to make, but since you turn your oven to 500 degrees, you have to have faith in the recipe the first time you try it.

I recommend trying it for the first time on a lazy weekend. Not that you'll need the extra time, but so you can learn to trust the instructions in this recipe. After that, you'll be amazed at how incredibly delicious this is.

And you'll want to invite your friends over just to make this for them.
Note about turning your oven to 500F: unless your oven is clean, you may want to turn on a fan or open a window. The crud in the oven will burn and smoke. This is the note in the roasting book, not a horror story from our kitchen. Really.

Ingredients:

Approx 3 lbs chicken, quartered, skin on
8 medium potatoes, any type, cleaned and quartered - we like the waxy Yukon Golds best for this recipe
2-3 yellow onions, cleaned and thinly sliced
1 parsnip, cleaned and sliced (you can omit this if you can't find it in the store, but it adds a fresh sweetness to the potatoes)
Fresh garlic, minced (You decide how much you like. We like a LOT, like maybe a whole bulb.)
Salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste

Preheat oven to 500F. Oil a large baking pan and arrange the chicken in the pan. Tuck in any wing tips, if necessary.

Roast 10 minutes. Drizzle olive oil over the cut vegetables and toss to coat.

Remove chicken from the pan, add vegetables, arrange the chicken on top, season the whole thing to taste, and roast for about 30-40 more minutes.

Serve with salad. Makes fantastic leftovers.
You'll just wish you used more potatoes, trust me.

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:49 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

View of the carriage house

Posted: 17 Apr 2010 12:09 PM PDT

View of the carriage house, originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

Here's the view from the sunny kitchen windows to the carriage house and back yard. No garage, but the carriage house stores the lawn mower, grill, and misc outdoor kind of stuff.

In the foreground is the kitchen island.

...and lots of unpacked, un-put-away clutter...

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Monday, May 3, 2010

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Sunday, April 18, 2010

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