Sunday, June 6, 2010

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:29 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Posted: 05 Jun 2010 05:47 PM PDT

I've got a webcam on my computer that I haven't really used… because I'm a little scared to. And like many gals, I'm pretty critical of how I look so I don't like to see pictures of myself let alone share them with other people.
Today the little voice in my head yelled "Get over it!"
So I got over it. This is me.

Now I have a question to ask you… How does the color look? I'm not sure if my camera is off or if my computer's color settings are all wonky. This picture looks very lavender to me. I'm wearing a chartreuse t-shirt and my walls are frappuccino beige.
I'd appreciate any comments on the color… and any kind words about my picture.
Thanks!
-Pam

PS: I fiddled with it and came up with this version. It's a little better... What do you think?

Pam's Inbox

5:28 AM

Pam's Inbox

DADDY'S GONNA EAT YOUR FINGERS

Posted: 02 Jun 2010 10:18 AM PDT

I was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said,'Daddy, look at this' , and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said, 'Daddy's gonna eat your fingers,' pretending to eat them.

I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face.

I said, 'What's wrong, honey?'

She replied, 'What happened to my booger?'

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:55 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Rachel's love for longboarding, part 2

Posted: 01 Jun 2010 01:01 PM PDT

Yesterday I showed you Rachel's workshop and told you how she's been building longboards. I included a video of some guys on the Ceviche longboard.

Today I have to show you the Whirling Dervish longboard. This is what got Rachel totally hooked on the sport - and the art of building these boards.

I want to mention that I talked about her building presses to create the concave and camber curves in the wood when she glues the layers of wood together. You can see at the beginning of this video that the board with the green wheels has an arching curve down the length of the board. This is the camber and it gives the rider some flex and turn control when riding the board.

Hope you enjoy the video. It's amazing how much their skating looks like an art form or some kind of modern dance. Oh - and they're not falling off. They're sliding - they wear special gloves to protect their hands and reduce friction on the pavement. That's part of the sport/art of longboarding.

Pam's Inbox

5:48 AM

Pam's Inbox

Jeff Gordon Fires Pit Crew

Posted: 31 May 2010 10:36 AM PDT

Raleigh, NC (UPI) --
Jeff Gordon announced today that he was firing his entire pit crew. This anouncement followed Gordon's decision to take advantage of President Obama's scheme to employ Harlem youngsters.

The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment; whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with millions of dollars worth of high tech equipment.

It was thought to be an excellent and bold move by Gordon's management team, as most races are won or lost in the pits..

However, Gordon got more than he bargained for!

At the crew's first practice session, not only was the inexperienced crew able to change all 4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had changed the paint scheme, altered the VIN, and sold the car to Dale Jr. for 10 cases of Bud, a bag of weed, and some photos of Jeff Gordon's wife in the shower.

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:15 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Ceviche Longboards

Posted: 31 May 2010 01:00 PM PDT

Since moving into our house, Rachel has taken over a portion of the basement where there is a workshop.

She learned how to use all the tools and has started building longboards. She even built a press to form the concave and camber curves in the board while creating the board. I'm so impressed with what she's been doing in her workshop.

Her second longboard looks like a Ceviche. That's the black one on the right.

She has been building her third board, the longer one in the picture above, over the past few weeks and took the trucks and wheels off the Ceviche-style board so she can fit them onto the new board.

Longboards and skateboards are fully customized when built, starting with a collection of components that you purchase separately. Trucks are the metal hardware that the wheels attach to. The picture below is the belly of her first board with one set of trucks and wheels already off.

So how are longboards different from skateboards? (Here's my mom's-view explanation. You other boarders may disagree and I welcome any clarification.) Skateboards are smaller and nimble for jumps and tricks and looping in and out of skateparks and bowls. You've seen these boards on the X-Games, Tony Hawk video games, and in pictures on boys' t-shirts. Longboards are less about vertical jumps and airborne tricks and more about cruising, gliding, and horizontal maneuvers.

Skateboards to longboards is like:

Jeep Wrangler - Cadillac Escalade

barn storming - hang gliding

chihuahuas - labrador retreivers

...kinda sorta...

Here's a video of some guys using the Ceviche.
Tomorrow I'll show you a couple of guys on the Whirling Dervish longboard.

Pam's Inbox

5:02 AM

Pam's Inbox

1-2-3

Posted: 22 May 2010 03:21 PM PDT

On his 77th birthday, Pete got a gift certificate from his wife Molly.

The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction. After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man and wondered what he was in for.

The medicine man slowly and methodically produced a potion, handed it to him, and with a grip on his shoulder, warned, "This is powerful medicine and it must be respected. You take only a teaspoonful and then say 1-2-3. When you do that, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."

The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?"

The medicine man responded, "Your partner must say 1-2-3-4, but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."

Eager to see if it worked, the old man went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, He took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3".
Immediately, he was the manliest of men.

His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes. And then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?"

And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition.... because we could end up with a dangling participle...

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:06 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

The most dangerous cake recipe in the world

Posted: 19 May 2010 10:16 AM PDT

5 MINUTE CHOCOLATE MUG CAKE
4 tablespoons flour
4 tablespoons sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 egg
3 tablespoons milk
3 tablespoons oil
3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)
A small splash of vanilla extract
1 large coffee mug (MicroSafe)

Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well. Add the egg and mix thoroughly.

Pour in the milk and oil and mix well..

Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla extract, and mix again.
Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts.

The cake will rise over the top of the mug, but don't be alarmed!

Allow to cool a little, and tip out onto a plate if desired.
EAT ! (this can serve 2 if you want to feel slightly more virtuous).

And why is this the most dangerous cake recipe in the world?
Because now we are all only 5 minutes away from chocolate cake at any time of the day or night!

Pam's note: You could even pre-mix several cakes worth of dry ingredients in a container and make your cake with 3/4 c of mix. Now you're only 4 minutes away from chocolate cake. Yikes!

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:31 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Awkward Family Photos

Posted: 14 May 2010 02:47 PM PDT

A while ago, my friend Gautam emailed me a link to the funniest thing I have seen in ages. I was cleaning out some stuff on my computer when I came across this again.

Have you ever had family portraits taken for your church directory?

We have (when I was a kid) and they were terrible.

If you know the shame I'm talking about, don't delay. Head straight over to Awkward Family Photos post haste. You'll feel much better about your own family photos.

Brace yourself.

PS: A link has been posted to the sidebar of our blog, Pam's Inbox.

Pam's Inbox

5:13 AM

Pam's Inbox

WALK NAKED IN AMERICA DAY

Posted: 12 May 2010 08:33 AM PDT

Don't forget to mark your calendars.

As you may already know, it is a sin for a Muslim male to see any woman other than his wife naked and if he does, he must commit suicide. So next Saturday at 1 PM Eastern Time, all American women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists.

Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorist effort.

All patriotic men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their houses to demonstrate their support for the women and to prove that they are not Muslim terrorist sympathizers. Since Islam also does not approve of alcohol, a cold 6-pack at your side is further proof of your patriotism.

The American government appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-terrorist activity.

God bless America!

P.S. It is your patriotic duty to inform others. If you don't send to at least 1 person, you're a terrorist-sympathizing, lily-livered coward and are possibly aiding and abetting terrorists.

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

6:12 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

The Picture of Pam & Frank

Posted: 07 May 2010 09:50 PM PDT

Typical.

Pam's Inbox

5:31 AM

Pam's Inbox

computer error

Posted: 02 May 2010 03:39 PM PDT

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.

As he was walking away, I called after him, 'So, what was wrong? He replied, 'It was an ID ten T error.'

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired, 'An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again.'

Eric grinned.... 'Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?'

'No,' I replied. 'Write it down,' he said, 'and I think you'll figure it out.'

So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T

I used to like Eric !!!!!!

Sunday, June 6, 2010

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