Wednesday, September 30, 2009

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:12 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Posted: 29 Sep 2009 09:02 AM PDT

I didn't steal your lunch. I know there are a lot of similar lunch bags in here, but I'm amazed you didn't wonder why there was someone else's lunch in your bag - or why it was on the opposite side of the fridge. Honestly, it made me giggle. Meanwhile, if you're looking for a secure place to hide your dogs so they too don't get stolen, you might want to compose your own nasty note for the lunch thief. Or bring in a Tupperware of earth worms… just in case…

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:41 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Lunch Saga, Part 1

Posted: 28 Sep 2009 04:22 PM PDT

For the last few years I have had dishes and flatware as well as my lunch stolen from the lunch bag I keep in the refrigerator down in the break room here at work. It's so frustrating to go to a deli and pick up 2-3 days worth of lunchy stuff only to find my empty lunch bag sitting on top of the fridge the next day when I want to eat lunch. My home silverware collection has dwindled to the point where I'm considering buying a whole new set so we have enough forks and spoons to get us through a meal.

I blame the night cleaning guy for throwing it in the trash, but I could be wrong.

My lunch bag has a bright ribbon on it so I can identify it in the fridge, (my name is even written on the ribbon) and there's now a big nasty note taped inside the lid that basically says "Keep Out and Stop Stealing My Sh!t" This has helped... until today when the most bizarre thing happened.
Today I went to get a snack out of my lunch bag and couldn't find it in the fridge where I usually keep it. I looked on top of the fridge, in the cupboards, then had the thought that someone finally stole or threw away the entire bag. A little voice in my head suggested I open the other side of the fridge, just in case.

Voila! There it is...on a shelf I never use, with my bright ribbon facing the back of the fridge.

I opened it up, pushed aside my nasty note, and was amazed to discover someone's package of hot dogs tucked in the back behind my yogurt, a bagel, and today's lunch, which was brought in on Friday.

Huh. Is this a gift?

Or have they been having the same problem I'm having and thought it would be more secure in my bag with the nasty note inside?

Since they didn't leave me any buns or ketchup, I decided to remove the hot dogs and place them on the shelf where my bag had been sitting (on the other side of the fridge from where I always keep my bag.) Then I put my bag back in its usual space, turned so I can see the bright ribbon right in front.

I'm debating putting a note on the fridge to let the hot dog owner know where they can find their lunch...

Pam's Inbox

5:29 AM

Pam's Inbox

DUI-TEXAS Style

Posted: 26 Sep 2009 10:44 AM PDT

Only a person in Texas would think of this.

From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story. Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Austin , Texas after last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk.

The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it.

He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off--it was a fine, dry summer night--, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and t hen switched on the lights.

He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left.

At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a Breathalyzer test.

To his amazement, the Breathalyzer indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said, I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station.

This Breathalyzer equipment must be broken.'

'I doubt it,' said the truly proud Redneck. 'Tonight I'm the designated decoy...'

The Giraffe Test

Posted: 26 Sep 2009 10:24 AM PDT

Here's a Giraffe test for you

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

Stop and think about it and decide on your answer before you scroll down.

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Did you say, Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?

Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend .... Except one. Which animal does not attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there? This tests your memory. Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer:? You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a
four-year-old.

Send this out to frustrate all of your smart friends.

PS: Just the fact that I sent it to you should make you feel good.

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:10 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Foggy Lens

Posted: 24 Sep 2009 09:57 AM PDT

This is one of my favorite paintings. When she was in the 3rd grade, Rachel asked me to buy her a $2 canvas because she wanted to paint. She took it outside to the picnic table with a box of paint and brushes and went to work.

Within a short time, she had created this. She calls it a mess and doesn't like it, but there's just something about it that I love. It hangs on my bedroom wall so I can look at it every day.

Cost? We already had the paint, and the canvas was $2.

Oh, and I had the feed the starving artist when she was done.
A PB&J sandwich and a glass of milk set me back an additional 35 cents.

[PamHawk.com] New comment on Six steps to designing a Project Wonderful ad.

9:24 AM

Lexi and Gem has left a new comment on your post "Six steps to designing a Project Wonderful ad":

Thanks so much, super easy tutorial to follow.
I just made our first Project Wonderful ad-yay!

Posted by Lexi and Gem to PamHawk.com at September 22, 2009 9:24 AM

Pam's Inbox

5:38 AM

Pam's Inbox

Oregon

Posted: 19 Sep 2009 10:52 AM PDT

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Oregon

If you've worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time, you live in Oregon

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number, you live in Oregon

If you measure distance in hours, you live in Oregon

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Oregon

If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you live in Oregon

If you install security lights on your house and garage but leave both doors unlocked, you live in Oregon

If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Central, Southern or Eastern Oregon

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a two layers of clothes or under a raincoat, you live in Oregon

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow and ice, you live in Oregon

If you know both seasons: the rainy season and July 12, you live in Oregon http://www.salemhistory.net/natural_history/july_12.htm

If you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash, you live in Oregon

If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee, you live in Oregon

If you know more people who own boats than air conditioners, you live in Oregon

If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk" signal, you live in Oregon

If you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain... you live in Oregon

If you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best, and Dutch Bros, you live in Oregon

If you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon, you live in Oregon

If you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Abiqua, Issaquah, Oregon, Umpqua, Yakima, Netarts, Nehalem, Albany, and Willamette, you live in Oregon

If you consider swimming an indoor sport, you live in Oregon

If you know that Boring is a city and not just a feeling, you live in Oregon

If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean, and Thai food, you live in Oregon

If you never go camping without waterproof matches and a poncho, you live in Oregon

If you have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain, you live in Oregon

If you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists, you live in Oregon

If you buy new sunglasses every year, because you cannot find the old ones after such a long time, you live in Oregon

If you actually understand these jokes and forward them to all your OREGON friends, you live or have lived in Oregon

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:07 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Getting Zapped at the Science Museum

Posted: 17 Sep 2009 10:59 AM PDT

...as seen in the OMSI parking lot...

Electric Vehicle Charging Station, originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

It's a Zap car, parked at an Electric Vehicle Charging Station at OMSI*... plugged in and charging.

How neat is that?

...as seen in the OMSI parking lot..., originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

When I mentioned this to a friend, he said they have these charging stations in downtown Salem, too. I hadn't seen them, but we do have a few of these three-wheeled Zap cards tooling around in the city, so it makes perfect sense to me.

Have you seen anything like this in your area?

*OMSI = Oregon Museum of Science & Industry

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

5:38 AM

The Adventures of Pam & Frank

Cape Kiwanda in Pacific City

Posted: 15 Sep 2009 02:06 PM PDT

This is one of our favorite beaches. Never too crowded like the ones in Lincoln City, interesting tide pools, and there's always the sand dune to climb...

Ummm, yeah, this must be low tide.

Cape Kiwanda in Pacific City, Oregon, originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

The group of people to the left of the tidepools found something interesting. Maybe a starfish? Could be sea anenomes or some tiny rockfish?

Cape Kiwanda Tidepools, originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

Those gnarly looking black and white things at the bottom of the rock walls are mussels. Like the kind you would order in a seafood or Italian restaurant.

Rachel in a cove at Cape Kiwanda, originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

This was a dumb idea. Barnacles (the hard pointy little white things) hurt to walk on. Like walking on tacks. Ouch!

barefoot on the tidepools, originally uploaded by Adventures of Pam & Frank.

This virtual visit to Pacific City has been brought to you by the letter S.

For Sun.

And Sand.

And Sea.

Pam's Inbox

5:19 AM

Pam's Inbox

The Post Office and Heaven

Posted: 12 Sep 2009 08:05 AM PDT

A little boy was waiting for his mother to come out of the grocery Store. As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, "Son, can you tell me where the Post Office is?"

The little boy replied, "Sure! Just go straight down this street a coupla blocks and turn to your right."

The man thanked the boy kindly and said, "I'm the new pastor in town. I'd like for you to come to church on Sunday. I'll show you how to get to Heaven."

The little boy replied with a chuckle. "Awww, come on... you don't even know the way to the Post Office."

Pass It On Plates

5:03 AM

Pass It On Plates

Find your Plate Number

Posted: 12 Sep 2009 10:13 AM PDT

You can find your plate number two different ways.

If you wish, you can scan the list for your plate number and click the link to visit your Plate Diary.
Or, on your keyboard, hold down the CTRL button as you press the F key. Enter your plate number in the box and press enter.

Our website's search function has not been working properly and we sincerely apologize for the inconvenience. This list includes all our plate numbers but may not yet include all the links. We are working as fast as we can to get all the links included here. You may be able to use the search box at the top of the page, but the results may be incorrect. If you have a Pass It On Plate, we promise that it does have a Plate Diary.

If you have trouble locating your plate number, please email us at info@passitonplates.com and we'll reply with a link to your Plate Diary.

Thank you for your patience while we work to improve your experience in finding your plate number.

200705300002

200705300003

200705300004

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